It appears that air is the latest culprit to suffer the governor’s magnificent machete as he swings without aiming to cut-off funding for everything from aid for the disabled, medicare and medicaid, funding for HBCU’s, teacher’s compensation, high-speed rail, and just last week signed into law a controversial election bill restricting early voting.
Air is next. I can see it now:
Florida residents will have to prove their daily consumption in order to gain access to air and even then it will only be available at state rest stops along the I-95 corridor. Air will be distributed based upon income, tax bracket, social status, and, well, political party.
I see many democratic voters falling faint from lack of air.
“I see dead people,” said Rick Scott.
Floridian’s will have to pay a non-refundable, $20 fee to renew their driver’s license and only then will they have a special air hologram placed on their laminated necessity. All non-drivers will have to take a mandatory drug test, an x-ray to determine lung capacity, and then write a haiku before being awarded an Access Card for air.
It’s coming folks. As sure as I sit here gasping for breath, I can feel the “Rick Scott Squeeze” and choke-hold suffocating me as the air around me leaves the room. Operatives from the Scott administration have apparently already been dispatched around the state to implement his triadic cut, slash, and restrict tactics.
Of course this sounds ludicrous, and it is also with “jest” that I offer the aforementioned. However, the following links illustrate the severity of the governor’s quick-cut political management that is destined to dethrone Florida as both the sunshine state and the U.S. tourism capital.
New signs have already been ordered:
“Welcome to Florida…bring your own air.”
Or even better,
“Welcome to Walt Disney World. A breath-taking family adventure.”
OR better yet,
“Welcome to Florida…our beaches, like our people, are breathless.”
He’s killing us Florida. He must be stopped. He simply must be impeached, and the following links support my demands:
Florida Gov. Rick Scott cuts all funding to state’s HBCUs
Is it time to recall Rick Scott?
Rick Scott’s cuts funds to the disabled.
Rick Scott’s budget plans calls for deep cuts.
Florida budget cuts
President Barack Obama criticizes Rick Scott
Florida is set to become the stingiest state.
Rick Scott and Medicare Fraud
Florida unemployment gets cut
Rick Scott cut teacher’s pay
Rick Scott signs controversial election bill
Contact Governor Scott
Office of Governor Rick Scott
State of Florida
400 S. Monroe St.
Tallahassee, FL 32399-0001
(850) 487-0801 (fax)